Dear Layne:

There is something I would like for you to know, something no one else may ever say that I believe you should hear at least once in your life.

As your grandma, I feel it is my responsibility to let you in on a secret.

And no, I am not trying to persuade you into changing who you are or who you will one day become.

That wouldn’t be fair.

Just please know this … in case no one else ever tells you.

You are growing up in a completely different society than the one I grew up in, different than the ones your grandparents and great-grandparents lived through, too.

There may come a point, a moment, when you will be so angry with somebody.

It might be your father or your mother.

It might be a grandparent or just an older adult.

And you will think that they have absolutely no idea how today’s society works.

You see, I know that younger generations think older people have no clue about life.

They think we are stupid and out of touch with reality.

But that isn’t the truth.

Many parents have heard from their child, especially their teenage child, that the world is a much different place today.

They tell us life isn’t like it used to be when we were growing up.

And they say this whenever they are angry, or upset or sad about something.

Maybe it’s their choice of friends or somebody they want to be in a relationship with, and the adults tell them no. That it isn’t a good choice.

Or maybe the child wants to go to a nightclub or somewhere without supervision and the adult forbids them to go.

There are all kinds of scenarios.

The point is, children think they know so much.

The truth is, they are only beginning to learn.

You can have a 4.0 grade-point average … but that doesn’t make you an expert on the world.

No one is an expert.

You may hear from adults that just because times have changed, that doesn’t mean that people have.

I am here to tell you that this isn’t true.

People are changing all the time.

Sadly, I can not say it is for the better.

An adult may tell you how life isn’t all that different.

They will say the world is still basically about having values and knowing the difference between right and wrong.

In some capacity, that is true.

No amount of decades or centuries should change that.

But I am here to tell you that I think you are right.

Things are different now than they used to be.

I am on your side.

I agree that life for young people is different than when we were growing up.

You know, I can remember watching television when you weren’t allowed to swear.

Can you believe that?

If something had to be broadcast and someone used a “bad word,” they simply bleeped it out.

Nowadays, almost every show contains profanity.

I guess writers think it makes the show more realistic, more authentic, more believable.

So yes, you are right.

Things are different than they used to be.

I remember when it was acceptable to talk about God in school.

We would stand for the Pledge of Allegiance every day.

When your grandparents or great-grandparents grew up during times of war, schools would gather in the auditorium, listen to the radio and pray.

They would ask God to protect their loved ones, their neighbors, fighting overseas.

I want you to know that there was a time when God was allowed to be in our schools.

Until he wasn’t.

And when you remove the good from something, it allows space for evil to enter.

Today, schools have metal detectors.

They practice active shooter scenarios rather than practice fire or tornado drills like we had.

So yes, I whole-heartedly believe you when you say how things are different now than the way they used to be.

Parents, for the most part, always want their children to have a better life than they had.

So, they begin saving, planning, to send their child to college in the hopes they will have a successful job.

Today’s colleges, however, instill upon students their opinions, their beliefs.

And those beliefs are usually the opposite of what that student’s parents tried to instill in them since the moment they were born.

Yes, Layne, the world you are growing up in is very different than the ones we experienced.

You have social media.

It was non-existent when I was your age.

We communicated face-to-face, not on Facebook.

We played outdoors.

And when we did play inside, they were games we created using our imagination — not online video games with total strangers who could potentially be a sexual predator.

Advancements in technology have given you options that we could never have dreamed of having.

You are right, the world has changed.

But those advancements aren’t always for the better.

People have always discovered ways to manipulate and bully others.

It just happens more frequently today. After all, technology has made it so simple.

So should the time ever come when you find yourself saying to someone how they don’t understand, when you tell them things are different now than before … remember me.

Remember the time I told you how older people do understand. We really do. We only want what is best for you, Layne. Truly.

We do know how things are no longer the way they were before.

And we are so sorry for that.

I honestly wish you could have experienced it.

All of my love,

Grandma J.

(Stenger is the community editor of the Herald-Star and The Weirton Daily Times. She can be contacted at jstenger@heraldstaronline.com.)