I miss my boys.

I realize it’s only been a matter of two weeks since they were all under the same roof once again.

While the greatest moments of my life are the ones where I spend with them, it’s always heartbreaking when they close the door behind them until the next time.

That hug goodbye is always the hardest.

Hearing “Bye, Mom,” as they walk away always leaves me in tears.

But that is the way it was meant to be.

They go back to their own city. Back to their own state. Back to their own lives.

You know, it seems every time I write about them, I cry.

Droplets form on my keyboard and the computer screen becomes a mere blur.

Perhaps it would be best for my emotions if I didn’t talk about them at all.

It would lessen some of that recurring pain. At least a little bit.

But then again, if I were to do that, I wouldn’t have very much to discuss in this little section of the paper.

Without my boys, there really isn’t anything left to say.

Nor would I find small windows of time to be able to smile as I reflect on a special moment we shared, the times when we all laughed about the same inside joke that only we would understand.

As the parent of an adult child, we have to learn to let go. Not entirely, but enough.

And letting go can be rather difficult. It’s probably the hardest thing we ever have to do.

At least for me it was.

Having to watch your entire world walk out the door … not knowing when or if they will ever return.

I hate to say that or to think that.

But it’s always a possibility. And all I can do is keep holding on to faith, because faith is all we really have.

Yes, there’s talk about hope and love thrown in there, as well.

Faith, hope and love.

Those three always go hand-in-hand … or so I’ve heard.

But for me, it’s only about faith.

Hope left long ago.

And love for me, is just a concept.

But faith … if I were to ever lose that?

Well, then I will have lost absolutely everything.

So I keep the Bible verse: “Be still. And know that I am God,” in the back of my mind — at all times.

I have learned that we cannot worry about things for which we have absolutely no control over.

I put my everything into God’s hands.

I like to think he knows what he is doing.

My mother once explained something to me that has stayed with me throughout the years.

Whenever my family would be confronted with a problem or a chaotic moment where I didn’t know if we would get through whatever it was we were experiencing, she reminded me why teenagers are the way they are.

As she puts it, and please know this is not verbatim, babies are born adorable and helpless.

They are created this way so we will immediately fall in love with them.

And it will be a love so strong, so powerful, that nothing they could ever do will make us no longer love them.

We would literally die for our children.

And she was right.

She then pointed out that those babies will eventually grow up and become teenagers.

(And we all know the definition of a teenager.)

No, not the one found within the pages of a dictionary.

But rather, the one that defines them as being moody, defensive, rebellious, defying.

That sort of thing.

No, not all of them. But most.

Teenagers will give us a hard time. And often, they’ll become a stranger to us — someone we barely recognize anymore.

As my mother explained to me, this is why we are able to let our children go more easily.

Why we can allow ourselves to be all right with their moving out of the house and learning to make their own way in this world.

Because that tiny adorable baby, that small child who once considered us to be their everything, including their protector against the monsters hiding in their closet … would we ever really want to let them go?

Probably not.

But a teenager? A teenager can be another story.

She also pointed out that in time, those teenagers will eventually become an adult.

They will ultimately find their way back to you.

They will appreciate you and love you the way it was meant to be.

Yes, I would have loved for my children to have stayed with me indefinitely, despite our indifferences at times.

But a mother needs to let her children go.

A mother needs to trust she has instilled the proper values in her children to make them good people.

A mother needs to love her children enough to say goodbye whenever that time finally comes, for everyone is meant to have a life of their own.

Our children are meant to have their own families.

Our children are meant to have their own babies to love and protect.

And yes, our children are meant to parent a teenager who will one day give them grief for no reason whatsoever.

That’s life.

And I would never want to deprive any of my children all of those wonderful moments.

And yet, I still cannot wait for the next family celebration or the next holiday event that will bring them all home to me once again.

How I look forward to that time.

I look forward to the day when I can have another week or even half a week just knowing they are all OK.

Just knowing they are all underneath the same roof is enough.

I am sure the day will come when they all will not come home at the same time anymore.

Work or family will take precedence.

And that’s OK. Again, that’s life.

But I will always continue to hold on to that faith. That faith which allows me to believe that there will always be one more opportunity for us to create new memories together.

Memories that, when we are living in our separate parts of the world, we can each look back and laugh. Or cry. Perhaps both.

Yes, I miss my kids.

I miss them because no matter what we all may be feeling — happiness, anger, sadness … there is always, always love in that room.

It doesn’t need to be said. It just is.

Until we see one another again, all I can do is put my faith into God’s hands.

All I can do is to simply … be still.

Be still and know that he will take care of them for me the best he possibly can since I can no longer be there for them. I do not know of a greater gift that a mother could possibly ever receive.

(Stenger is the community editor for the Herald-Star and The Weirton Daily Times newspapers. She can be contacted at jstenger@heraldstaronline.com.)